Today I learned never to wash a cat!

Upon returning home, I realised that my phone was ringing so I rushed to answer it.
Whilst talking on the phone my three month old kitten used her litter tray and I noticed that she had a slightly pooey bum afterwards.
I quickly got off of the phone and decided to pop her in the bath - first idiotic mistake.
All cat owners will know that cats HATE water and you only wash them at really necessary times, this was one of them.
I took off my jumper so that the sleeves would not get wet - second idiotic mistake - and started to run a bath - third idiotic mistake. If you are placing a cat in the bath then your arms are exposed. I obviously hadn't thought this through in my hast to de-poo my poor kitty.
I picked her up and placed her in the luke warm water and she went as stiff as a board and started to wail like an air raid siren! Or what I imagine an air raid siren may have sounded like (I am only 22).
She flipped around and then sank her claws AND teeth into my right arm and try as I might, I could NOT pull her off with my left hand. I had to lower her out of the bath, still attached to my arm and she slowly released her grip on me.
I then resorted to cleaning her bum with a face wipe.
It was awful, I could cry. I now have scratch marks, bite marks and bruises up my arm.
Perhaps this is karma for leering at a rather attractive sales assistant in Zara....